Friday, March 26, 2010

A Guy Hit on Me Today -- Yay!

I am so excited.

A guy hit on me today.

A real live heterosexual guy.

I was at the gym, which, in itself is a major accomplishment - in the Cafe eating my yams (hey, they're supposed to be good for ok, I got two, what the heck, it's a good carb, right?) Anyway, a guy started a conversation with me.

This never happens. I don't know about you, or where you live, but on the west side of Los Angeles, at the "Gym for Snotty Anorexics" no one initiates conversation with a stranger.

Especially a more "mature" (nee OLD DOG) like me. If anyone starts a conversation it's usually to complain about cutting in line or changing Fox News to CNN. (Hey, I never said I was perfect, or particularly SWEET either.)

Well, this lovely young man, (yes, thank you God, he was YOUNG, hurray!! And VERY handsome. I'm not kidding), invited me to sit with him.

(WAIT a second, he wasn't THAT young. Nor was he what rhymes with "young" either -- uh, not that I looked or anything..)

I thought, well he's very nice, but I'm MARRIED, (ugh) and I had "important' emails to read. But he insisted, "I didn't mean to hit on you." I immediately cut him off with, "OMG, are you kidding me? PLEASE hit on me. I have no problem with this. Hit away! I've been married for over twenty years, so this doesn't occur very often."

Turns out this lovely man has only been a member of the "Gym for Snotty Anorexics" a mere two weeks. Hence, he's not familiar with the perpetual scowl and disgust everyone extends to each other. Their version of a warm greeting. It's particularly detrimental if you dare talk, sweat, sneeze, cough, read, laugh, smell, stare, or breathe when you're on a machine.

It's considered bad manners. You certainly don't want to interrupt the intense workout of your fellow gym rat. So, this lovely guy is an innocent. A "Gym for the Snotty Anorexic" neophyte.

We had a lovely talk until........... he mentioned the dreaded...........

"I'm a trainer."

Ugh, I'm being solicited. Then came the card.

Gosh, is it THAT obvious? Does my body scream, "This gal needs a trainer, help her quickly." It shouldn't since I HAVE a trainer who I've been seeing for the past five years. (Hellooooo, Tom?? What is going on?? Why does this guy think I need a trainer, when I have YOU? What are YOU doing WRONG, Tom?? Apparently, I'm not exactly a great advertisement for you, am I?)

However, I couldn't tell my husband the GREAT news fast enough. I gleefully yelled into the phone, "A guy at the gym hit on me! Isn't that great??"

My husband wondered why, as my husband, this would be GREAT news for him? But I figure hey, isn't it great to know that another guy finds your wife attractive? My hub asked a lot of questions, beginning with, does the guy wear glasses? Ha-ha-ha. The GREAT news for him was that I didn't succumb to the sales pitch, and employ TWO trainers.

Oh well, I enjoyed it. Even if it WAS a solicitation. I'm gonna pretend that this guy really DID hit on me. Cause I want to believe that. So there!


  1. Your husband did not ask "does the guy wear glasses?"

    You husband asked: "How thick are the glasses this guy wears?"

  2. Gee, "Anonymous" I wonder WHO you are!

  3. How come we all have the same name? Is Joe Klein the author of this blog? Or does this have some obtuse relationship to grape Kool-Aid being gluten free?

  4. You sure it wasn't Ben Roethlisberger?